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 ☀ NEVER HAD SOMEONE, tag: jules with marcel
May 25 2017, 08:18 AM




buddy nahm
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.buddyaes1 {width:230px; background: #fff; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px;}.buddyaes2 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 15px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif; text-transform: uppercase; font-weight:700;}.buddyaes3 {width: 207px; padding: 10px; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px; margin-top: 5px;}.buddyaes4 {width:207px;text-align:justify;padding:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:115%;background-color:#FFFFFF; }.buddyaes4 b {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 12px; font-weight:700; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes4 i {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes5 a {color: #fff;}.buddyaes5 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 10px; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif;text-transform:uppercase;}as good for me as youThis was something very new for Buddy. This being their outfit in public. This being how they could comfortably hold their boyfriend’s hand without fear. This being going to a large crowded place. This being embracing a power that they hadn’t had for very long. This was all very new to them. And yeah, they were definitely scared, but they weren’t alone. They were going to the gifted parade with their boyfriend, having promised to say hi to a few friends on the way. Maggie, Shawn, Panda, a few colleagues. They were nervous, Buddy was always nervous, but they were also excited.They had an oversized pink sweater matched with some black leggings and the cutest little pink boots. Their hair was up in a half pony and they’d even put some soft and natural make up on. They felt adorable and had a kind of confidence that they couldn’t remember ever having. They didn’t even feel insecure about having their hearing aids in and very visible. They felt adorable! And had an adorable boy to join him for the day! “Are you going to take lots of pictures?” they asked, signing while they spoke and hoping Marcel would do the same. It was hard to pick one voice from another out in a crowd like this, and Buddy didn’t want to miss a single word. “If you are I might even let you take some of me,” they teased. While Buddy was definitely still recovering from losing their family, they were trying to focus on embracing the newfound freedom it gave them. The freedom to finally embrace everything soft and pastel and delicate. The freedom to go to places like this with their boyfriend! no notes // @marcel park
Jun 7 2017, 08:15 PM




marcel park
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@buddy nahm there's no more night, blue skies forever Things had taken a turn for the best, like Marcel always believed they would. He was back in Chicago, he and Buddy were a pretty official item, and Buddy was blossoming. Marcel had always been confident in himself, in his powers and all the ways he was different, had always gone to pride and liberation parades. And this year, he could share one of his favourite experiences with Buddy, who looked cute and happy and very... themselves. The happiest Marcel had seen them since the fallout with their parents.Marcel had encouraged Buddy to come to the parade, to hold his hand, to wear the cute outfits they wanted to wear, their hearing aids decorated with bright tape. That was what they were celebrating - the courage to be authentic, being proud of their differences instead of ashamed like a lot of people believed they should be.He had his camera slung around his neck, one hand holding the camera steady and the other clasped with Buddy's. He freed up a hand to sign back, leaving his camera swinging on the strap around his neck - since returning to Chicago and spending more time with Buddy he was getting better and more fluent."Of course. I might need an entire roll of film with how cute you look." .paradisecircus .top, .paradisecircus b, .paradisecircus a { color: #D8CE2D!important; }
Jun 19 2017, 05:01 AM




buddy nahm
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.buddyaes1 {width:230px; background: #fff; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px;}.buddyaes2 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 15px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif; text-transform: uppercase; font-weight:700;}.buddyaes3 {width: 207px; padding: 10px; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px; margin-top: 5px;}.buddyaes4 {width:207px;text-align:justify;padding:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:115%;background-color:#FFFFFF; }.buddyaes4 b {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 12px; font-weight:700; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes4 i {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes5 a {color: #fff;}.buddyaes5 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 10px; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif;text-transform:uppercase;}as good for me as youBuddy couldn’t remember the last time they had felt this good. Couldn’t remember the last time they had been this truly happy. The last time they had been able to be themselves free of fear. Sure, it was still there, but much smaller and quieter than before. A little whisper instead of loud screaming. Things with their parents hadn’t exactly gone well. It had pretty much happened exactly as Buddy had figured they would. The only difference from reality and imagination was that their dad was doing his best to understand. Reaching out in his own distant and guarded immigrant parent ways. It sucked. It hurt. But they were learning to pick themselves back up. Learning to be proud of all of the things Marcel seemed to love so much about them.They had only just started their journey of self acceptance but they were happy to be there. To see so many other people embracing all of the things that made them different. Maybe this year they would go to Pride instead of watching from the windows. In among the crowd of people embracing their gifts, the idea of signing in public wasn’t nearly as scary. There was a small child on a leash floating in their air like a balloon, a young couple using sign language with each other was the least of anyone’s worries. “Stop,” they insisted, cheeks flushed modestly. “You can take pictures of me whenever you want, you have to save some for the people you might never see again.” They liked Marcel’s photography. Loved the way that he could tell stories from just a split second. no notes // @marcel park
Jul 4 2017, 05:09 PM




marcel park
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@buddy nahm there's no more night, blue skies forever He laughed, finding delight in seeing Buddy's flushed cheeks, his sheepish grin. The thing about Marcel - he could say all these cheesy romantic things and truly mean them. Buddy was beautiful and captivating and his stars and his sky, all of it."It's hard to look away." he leaned in to peck Buddy on the cheek, clumsy and quick as they walked. It was hard to avert his eyes from their light, it was hard to let go of their hand to operate his camera. Marcel had always found beauty in the little things now, it was the sway of Buddy's hips, their fluid signing, the flush of their skin, their sweaty palm clasped with his. His photography had just become a way to capture it. But with Buddy, he just wanted to enjoy the moment, immerse himself fully, keep the memory in his mind because he was too giddy to think of technicalities.Looking back, it was hard to say how long Marcel's feelings had been more than friendly. It must have been years since the first seeds of romantic affection had been planted. Slow to bloom, but entirely worth the wait.He did manage to tear his attention from Buddy long enough to look around. There was plenty to see, other attendees, performances, booths set up along the street, vendors, packed patios. "Is there something you want to do first?" It wasn't Marcel's first time, but he was sure there was something Buddy had always dreamed of doing, the reason he'd come, the experience they wanted. .paradisecircus .top, .paradisecircus b, .paradisecircus a { color: #D8CE2D!important; }
Jul 12 2017, 06:38 PM




buddy nahm
[] • 0 posts


.buddyaes1 {width:230px; background: #fff; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px;}.buddyaes2 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 15px; font-size: 15px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif; text-transform: uppercase; font-weight:700;}.buddyaes3 {width: 207px; padding: 10px; border: solid 1px #E43FBF; padding: 10px; margin-top: 5px;}.buddyaes4 {width:207px;text-align:justify;padding:10px;font-size:10px;line-height:115%;background-color:#FFFFFF; }.buddyaes4 b {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 12px; font-weight:700; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes4 i {color: #E43FBF; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans', sans-serif;}.buddyaes5 a {color: #fff;}.buddyaes5 {width:200px; background: #E43FBF; color: #fff; text-align: right; padding: 10px; font-size: 10px; font-family: 'Open Sans Condensed', sans-serif;text-transform:uppercase;}as good for me as youBuddy couldn’t honestly recall a time when they weren’t completely in love with Marcel. It had always been there. As long as they could remember. Always in their dreams, even when it wasn’t on purpose. Always making their skin light up any time he touched them. Marcel was a dream come true. Always supportive. Always there, even when it couldn’t be physically. They had never been able to see anyone else quite like they saw Marcel. “I have that problem too,” they admitted with flushed cheeks. Buddy had never felt like anything special. They had never felt like they were beautiful or handsome or anything in between. Just an average Korean…something. Not quite a boy but not quite a girl either. They hadn’t felt like they were quite anything, but then Marcel came along making them feel like they were the world. Helping them find confidence to be themselves now that they didn’t have to worry about being found out.Their feelings for Marcel were overwhelming. And their feeling about Pride were overwhelming as well. They had always watched from afar. Too scared to ever be involved. They had never bothered to find out what was there beyond the parade part. Had never looked around. “I…don’t know,” they were tentative. “I know there’s booths and stuff to buy but where’s so much. Where do you even start?” They were overwhelmed. They had never been able to be open like this. “I’ve always been too scared to be here and to have people see me. And now than I’m here I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” Their signing was slow and shaky, trying to put together the right words in two different languages. no notes // @marcel park
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